An Introduction [Video]

[zenryokubatankyu]

[So all of this was more than a little confusing. It was...very, very confusing. First, he was given a new friend. Then he was told he was part of some kind of team, and he was going through training, and legitimately, his head was spinning and he did not sign up for this.

The camera flickers on, and the first thing immediately visible is a very exhausted-looking man, who heaves out a sigh before seemingly realizing it's on and putting on a lively grin much unlike the one he had on his face before. He gives a small salute to the camera.]

Yo~! I guess I should introduce myself, being new here, kinda confused, and...kinda having a headache if I'm being fully honest. The name's Matsuno Osomatsu, but any variety of 'Oso', 'Big Brother Oso', 'Osomatsu', 'Charisma Legend', 'Awesome Mirac--' ...I'm getting off track, huh?

[He clears his throat.]

So, um, I guess I'm with you guys now? Me and Snappy are, at least. Little guy's got big jaws!!! It's amazing! I'm kinda afraid I'll lose a hand....whiiiiiiiiich is super intimidating to the normies, am I right, or am I right?

[He fingerguns at the camera while winking. And then he coughs, looking a little tired again. Working at anything is hard for a NEET.]

If anyone has any advice for a newbie to the...um...criminal-ing world, let me know! I mean, it's not like I'm not capable, but there's a lot of nuance, probably. Probably!

Comments

[zenryokubatankyu]

...That's what I've got Snappy for, right?

He's really strong.
Aren't we supposed to scare people?
Or something?
Look man I just got here I don't know how to crime

[asmywitness]

Your Pokemon is level 15. The majority of trainers I've met have ones that multiple are level 100. Pick your targets carefully.

I've never gotten the impression locals are scared of us more than they are inconvenienced, but I tend to work small-scale. No-one who's an import like us is scared of Team Rocket whatsoever.

If you can, steal Pokemon to hand over. If not, catch them. Higher ups don't care how you get them, as long as you hand them in.

[zenryokubatankyu]

gkdgdgdkg god okay noted

they're not even scared of us...that sucks. but i guess it's...sorta good for flying under the radar...

i might catch at first just because i don't want to get my ass kicked if everyone's that strong

[asmywitness]

Catching is a good plan. Just make sure you're handing in stuff that's at least level 15 too, they have "Standards". If you want to look good, get stuff that's as high as you can handle.

There's jobs available as well, if you end up being shit at catching.

[zenryokubatankyu]

everything's so exact...okay. so i level snappy up, hand in higher levels, just keep moving forward from there. got it. i think i can buckle down for that.

but i'll definitely keep the second in mind too. it's probably harder than it sounds but i'll get the hang of it all eventually.

[asmywitness]

I'm an exacting person. And Team Rocket are sticklers for their internal rules.

Honestly, some of the jobs are easy as hell. Just sell candy bars that heal Pokemon if you want something really easy, it means you can travel around without any real restrictions.

[zenryokubatankyu]

yeesh ;; i'm not the 100% best at exacts, but if it's for the company, i'll go for it.

oh, wow, that's all? yeah, that's super easy! i can do that no sweat, i'll be on it!

[asmywitness]

No one is going to hold you to my standards, don't worry. I've been told I can be fairly anal-retentive about things.

All good, then. Just make sure you're training your team properly and catching some more where you can. It's useful having a full team but it also looks better if you have a set that's just for your public face. Keep some secret Pokemon on your reserve team so people don't know what to expect from you, or pin your Pokemon in a line-up if it's unique enough.

[zenryokubatankyu]

heh, that's kinda like one of my brothers. :3

ooh! okay, so train, keep a front team...but then some secret weapons! clever! they'll never see it coming!!! i'm gonna keep that in mind as i catch 'em.

[asmywitness]

How many do you have? I'm the oldest of five, but only one brother.

[what, he's curious now]

If you'd like a suggestion, there's a strong predilection towards Psychics, Ghosts, Dark and Poison types. Stuff that can disable people with little to no evidence or harm. I personally prefer Psychics, if you do end up wanting a hand with that. Steven and Solus both do Ghosts, and everyone dabbles a little in Poison types. I've got a few I'm not training as intensely if you'd like something a bit higher levelled to go out with.

[zenryokubatankyu]

lol! we're pretty close then. i'm the oldest of six identical brothers! sextuplets!

ooh....those are the spooky ones. ...you're serious, man? you'd give me one? o: that'd be super nice and awesome, actually, if you'd wanna!!! thank you!!!!

[asmywitness]

[holy shit their poor mum]

No worries. It'll be good for them to get out. And they're not too strong yet that you should have any real difficulty with them listening to you.

I'll grab two on my break and you can pick one. I'm already on-site, I do data work in the labs.

[zenryokubatankyu]

[yeah, she's been through a lot, strong lady]

yaaaay!! i'll do good work with 'em! tysm this'll help a bunch i think!! :D

we can switch to action if you wanna thread it out :3

[asmywitness]

Swing by the labs and ask for Tyler when you've finished training then.

Sure, if you wanna!

[zenryokubatankyu]

You got it, my dude!

I'm totally on top of my inbox

[asmywitness]

Tyler's glad he's finished with training hell. And also got into hypnotism, because pickpocketing is really hard if you can't hear when someone spots you.

It's not hard for Osomatsu to find him in the labs, at least - his computer's near the door, and there's a bright green Natu on the shoulder of his otherwise black Rocket uniform.

Ain't we both, pal?

[zenryokubatankyu]

Osomatsu is easily able to find Tyler in the labs, and he moseys over and waits to be noticed with a big smile on his face. There's a Trapinch resting on his own shoulder, and he's beaming. He's here! He gives a little wave when he's noticed. Hiya.

[asmywitness]

The Natu stares at Osomatsu immediately and intensely as the man walks in, so Tyler doesn't look up for a few seconds until he's finished typing his current train of thought.

Eventually he pushed his chair back a bit, swiveling to face Osomatsu with a half-quirked smile, and casually signs with his hands lax and close to his chest. The words get sent directly into Osomatsu's brain, like rather intrusive subtitles. Thanks for meeting me. I've got two Pokemon I think you ought to be able to handle right now. They'll be a bit strong still, but you can probably handle one of them just fine.

[zenryokubatankyu]

Whoa. That's so weird! Osomatsu looks surprised, his mouth opening a bit. "Whoa...that's..." He listens to the words, smiling a little. "Thank you so much for this~ I'm sure I can! What're they like?"

[asmywitness]

Huh. A much more sedate response to his style than usual. Tyler appreciates that.

One's a Poison-Fighting frog who's very good at sneaking up on and slapping the shit out of people, one's a Poison-Dark skunk with anxiety who can gas a room at lethal speed and cover your escapes.

[zenryokubatankyu]

He's seen some really weird things. This is low on the list, and it's at least an effective way of communicating.

Hmmm. He hears the two descriptions, then rubs his chin. "As much as I love slapping the shit outta people, something to cover my escape sounds useful. I'll go with that one!" Even if it did have anxiety. It's like Ichimatsu, but a Pokemon version.

[asmywitness]

Good choice. He stops signing for a moment, so he can unclip the correct ball from his belt, but his words continue regardless. I suggest making a gas mask a regular addition to your uniform.

He lobs the ball lazily to Osomatsu, and goes back yo signing. I'm not kidding about the anxiety, try not to lose that sachet she's carrying. It's her comfort chew toy, and it helps cover the smell when you've got her out just in general. She gets way smellier without it, or when something hits her.

[zenryokubatankyu]

Osomatsu takes the ball, beaming down at it. "Right. Gas mask. I'll ask for one, start making it regular. Actually not a bad idea anyway. Can't afford to let my face get seen too much when my brothers could show up at any time..." And he doesn't want to associate them with this. Not if he can help it. Nor does he want them to potentially recognize him. So this works all around.

"...Aw. She's tryin'. Don't lose the sachet, got it. I'll keep a close eye on her and on the toy. She's gonna do just fine with me." She's just a stinky baby. Stinky baby needs love. It's one of his new cherished pets. "She got a name already?"

[asmywitness]

Bessie Junior. Steve - the teenager, not the adult - bred his Miltank, Bessie, and gave me an egg. When she turned out not to be a Miltank too, I named it that to annoy him. She also answers to just Bessie, or BJ.

He's debating how true Osomatsu's statement is, but he's also just cynical. She should be due to evolve soon, actually, so don't freak out when she turns into an even bigger skunk.